Annie holland *sigh*

Is it really that much to ask for? Why cant you just let me be me? Im twenty two years of age. Let me be please! I cant take much more of this! The thoughts there eating away at my head. I cant believe this is happening all to fast. Why must i live like this? I dont need this at all. I think i hear boone calling my name! thats all.

Matt Faircloth- Why?

Why do you do that?
Why do you hate me?
Why must you kill it?
Why can't you let it be?
Why is it the same?
Just like it always was
Why can't you go away
Just leave me alone
Why must you screw me over?
Why do you think you're perfect?
Why?
Why?
Why?

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You, Me, and Her 2

Dennis Eason

February 23, 2010

Creative Writing 1

You, Me, and Her

The exhausting day centered around reading and signing my signature on contracts involving the makeup of mp3 players.  My black, leather chair with comfortable cushioning began to feel like a piece of wood that could rotate.  This added stress because for eight hours all I could think about was the pain in my ass from sitting in what used to be the most comfortable of chairs.  I signed my signature on the last contract with a sigh of relief and began to gather my things so I could leave from my office on the 6^th floor.  The 12^th through the 15^th floor was full of pompous vice presidents and executives who did nothing but tell jokes and talk about their exotic lifestyles.  I would be up there with them if it were not for my constant lateness and the heartbreaking sarcasm that I bring to my job.  Looking at my Rolex watch as the view behind me through the blinds of my huge window grew darker; the arms were just getting to 8:30 pm.  My cell phone beamed a light off of it indicating that I had missed a call.  It was from my dear and loving wife Tina.  Calling back yet getting no answer, I decided to give her a call on my way home.  With my coat on my right arm, I waved bye to my assistant Regina.  I left out with the feeling that she was going to be mad at me for not answering my phone in which past experiences would prove this correct.  Even the voicemail she left had a tone of sincerity mixed with anger.

My wife was special to me.  Our relationship was no better than anybody else's but I believe that it was something that made us stronger over the years.  We've been married for 10 of the most exhausting years that could either make a man or break a man.  Reaching my car, I placed my suitcase and my coat in the backseat of my dark green BMW and proceeded to call Tina.  By the time I sit down in the driver's seat she picks up the phone.  "Michael, how come you didn't pick up the phone when I called earlier?" says Tina.  She only called me Michael when she was angry.  "I was in the office finishing my paperwork.  While I'm out, do you want anything?"  "That's not an excuse for you not to call me back" says Tina.  Her tone struck an all too familiar cord that almost always gave way to an argument.  "I'm sorry but there were things that needed to be done so that I could make it home on time", I said.  "That's always been your problem Michael.   You always put your job before me!".    "Here we go again!" I thought as she went on to explain what my problem was. 

            Here I am, exhausted from a job that is physically demanding as much as mentally demanding and she won't even give me a break until I get home.  Starting my engine, I drove from the company parking lot and reached the main entrance of what is Turner Corporations.  Tina still maintained an attitude because at this point, she was talking to the point where she barely stopped to inhale.  "Tina, we can finish this conversation when I get home but for right now I want to know if you want anything while I'm out" I said trying to diffuse the situation for now.  "That's another problem you have Michael.  You never listen to what I have to say anymore.  Ever since we got married, you turned a deaf ear to anything I have to say" explains Tina.  "Fuck It, I will call you when I'm on my way home" I say as I take a detour to a well known bar around the corner.  I needed some time to clear my head before I went home to listen to Tina bitch for a couple of hours.

"Ups and Downs" was a bar that always welcomed me with open arms.  I knew the bartender, Alice, from the many times that I came in and talked to her.  She was kind, sweet, and she served me; everything I wanted in a wife that Tina wasn't.  Alice is two years younger than me with a caramel complexion and breasts that would drive men insane.  "What'll it be today Mike?" she asked fixing another customer a drink.  "The usual if you don't mind Alice".  "Women troubles again Mike?" she said as she fixed me a cup of Hennessy mixed with Pepsi; my favorite.  "No, just Tina" I said making light of the horrible situation to come.  "Take it easy Mike.  I don't want to have to take your keys like the last time" said Alice with a smile on her face.

            After work, Alice would make me feel like a king for 20 minutes only so that I could go home and be treated like a peasant for the rest of the night.  I took my drink in slowly thinking about the night before.  When I came home from work yesterday, Tina started to fuss about the time it took me get home from work.  When I told her that I went to the bar, she really got angry.  "You would rather go to a bar than to come home and be with me?" she asked smelling the alcohol from my breath.  I wanted so desperately to say yeah but that would create a different kind of problem that would stir for the rest of the night.  Still buzzed from the usual that Alice gave me, Tina made me sleep on the couch where back problems and headaches are a constant.

When Alice wasn't fixing other patrons a drink or brushing off those loud comments she heard every night, she was open to accept any conversation with me until I went home.  "So, what is it this time?" asked Alice with a smile on her face.  Digging my hand into the pretzel bowl that sat on the polished wooden bar, I began to spill another story of mine into her lap.  Sad, slow songs began to play from the jukebox in the far right corner beside the stage where drunken, amateur acts would take place.  "I love her but sometimes I get the feeling that she doesn't love me at all.  At first I'm too close to her and she needs her space and the next I'm not able to give her enough attention.  Maybe you could help me forget about her." 

"How would I be able to do that?" she asked with a confused look.  "By giving me enough drinks to crash on my way home", I replied taking another sip of my drink.  Shaking her head, she looked towards the clock that sat above the numerous alcohol bottles on the other side of the bar.  "Well you better head home now before she search the whole world for you", said Alice wiping off the bar where clumsy patrons spilled what they were drinking.  Downing the rest of my drink, I stood up and checked my phone again.  "Ok, but if you hear about me being killed, you're going to wish you gave me that extra drink", I said backing out of the bar.  

I walked to my car and opened the driver side door.  Feeling at least somewhat relieved about what was offered through the talk with Alice, I decided not to rush home and smoke a cigarette.  She called again while I was smoking but I decided to let my phone ring until either one of us calmed down.  Looking in the rear view mirror added a whole new excitement to my night.  I noticed that there was a man who walked up to the entrance of the bar.  He was all of 5'10" with a muscular build and skin as light as Alice's.  He began to pace back and forth with a cigarette in his mouth tapping his pockets.  I suppose he was trying to find a lighter.

Alice walked out of the bar and the guy began to yell at her which made me feel a little uncomfortable.  Her expression immediately changed from a happier mood to a displeased one as the guy went on.  To get a better look at the situation, I began to lean over the passenger seat with my right arm and stare out the back window.  The guy became hysterical and started to grip Alice by her shirt while pinning her to the dark red brick wall under the Ups and Downs sign.  When this happened, Tina sent a text message saying "Get Here NOW".  The time on my cell phone read 9:15 pm which meant I was really in deep shit when I got home.  I couldn't allow things with Alice to get worse though so decided to intervene.

Stepping out of the driver side of the car, I ran as fast as I could to get in the way of what seemed unfair.  When I got closer the conversation started to get a little clearer.  "This is how it feels to have your heart broken", he said raising his right hand to slap Alice.  Before he could deliver the blow, I pulled his right arm down and pushed him off of Alice.  "Are you alright", I ask Alice with my back turned to the guy.  "Look out", Alice screams but before I could turn completely around, the guy punched me in the face.  "Stop it Brad, Please, just stop it", screamed Alice as she frantically started to cry.  He grabbed me and slammed my 165 pound body to the ground.

The crowd from the bar rushed outside to see what was going on only to see Alice crying while I was getting my ass kicked.  Blocking the punches with my arms helped to ease the blows that were thrown towards my face.  "I'm calling the cops", shouted Alice pulling a cell phone out of her left jean pocket.  I knew the cops weren't going to get there right away so I decided to tip the odds of the fight in my favor.  Everyone in the crowd watched and shouted as if it were a boxing match made for television.  I managed to put my left hand in my pants pocket and pull out the mace that I bought me and Tina two months ago.  I sprayed the mace upwards hitting Brad in the eyes. 

Putting his hands over his eyes gave me an opportunity to push him off of me.  He sat up on his knees trying to rub the mace mixture out of his eyes.  I stood up and checked on Alice again but this time I decided to make sure my back wasn't toward him again.  "Are you alright?" she asks brushing the dirt off of my suit jacket.  "I'm alright I guess.  That punch to the face hurts like hell though" I say rubbing the right side of my jaw.  "Come inside so we could put some ice on that", she says with her right arm around my shoulder.  The crowd began to spill back into the bar while Brad was still on his knees.  Walking back in the bar where there were bright lights gave me the feeling of a hangover.

I sat on the same bar stool that I sat on when I first came in and tried to brush off the rest of the dirt and leaves that were stuck to my suit jacket.  Alice rushed to the kitchen area of the bar to fix me some ice for the punch in the face I took from Brad.  She came back out of the kitchen doors with a zip lock bag full of ice.  "Here you go Superman", she stated handing me the cold bag.  "Thanks but if you don't mind I would like a shot of the usual for my broken pride", I said pressing the bag of ice on my jaw.  Alice laughed wiping tear streaks off of her face.  I tried to laugh too but the pain from my jaw wouldn't let me.  She walked away for a second only to bring back the drink that I asked for.

"What was that all about" I asked taking a sip of my drink.  Alice looked down for a moment before answering.  "Just a misunderstanding, that's all.  I appreciate you coming to help me.  No one has ever tried to stop him before.  He would have beaten me black and blue before the cops would have gotten here", she says with a worried look on her face.  "Yeah, it's a good thing I came to take the beating for you", I said taking a bigger sip of the drink she handed me.  "Do you think he is still out there", I ask in concern for her safety as well as mine.  "I doubt it.  Just in case he is out there, I have you to protect me for the rest of the night I'm here" she said.  With that said I frantically look at my cell phone to check the time and it read 9:45 pm.

"I'm dead", I thought as the image of Tina pissed off made my face blank.  I've never been this late before so it's going to be a fun filled adventure as soon as I get home.  "I've never done this before so please bear with me", says Alice as she takes a pen and writes her name and number on a bar napkin.  "That won't be necessary", I said thinking about if Tina found that damn number in my pants pocket.  "I have to go before it's me who needs rescuing", I said getting up off of the bar stool.  Alice rushed around the bar and hugged me.  "Thanks again Mike", she said.  She kissed me on the cheek and I proceeded to leave the bar again.  Watching out for Brad, I walked to the car to find that he was nowhere in sight.  Getting in the driver seat, I started the ignition and proceeded to think about how I was going to explain my night to Tina.

On the drive home I had it in my mind that I was going to tell the truth.  Even though it was going to be the most unbelievable story to her, it was damn sure a true enough story for me.  I started smoking a cigarette to calm my nerves and played a little bit of music while I did at least 75 miles per hour.  The speed limit was 65 but I doubted if any cops would pull me over since I was almost home.  All of a sudden, red and blue lights started to flash in my rear view mirror.  My mind raced to figure out what the hell I was supposed to do because I just had a fresh drink that Alice gave me.  I tried to calm down and tell myself that it would be alright but the lights weren't so reassuring.  I took my speed down steadily and by the grace of God the cop went around me.  Relieved, I realized that I was home at last and I could finally relax.

            It was now 10:00 pm and there was still a light on in the living room.  Normally all the lights would be off at this time of night because she has to go to work in the morning at 8:00 but I guess she felt as if tonight was a special occasion to stay up.  Finishing the last of my cigarette I packed up my belongings from work and proceeded to head to the front door of my house.  I opened the door and it was silent when I walked in.  "Clear so far", I thought as I tried not to make any possible noises that could give me away. 

The doorway leads to the wide open space of the living room where burgundy rugs and matching love seats were placed.  The smell of fried chicken graced my nose as I tipped closer to the living room.  It wasn't as I expected because Tina wasn't in the living room as far as I could see.  I wasn't sure though for the simple fact that I could only see the light from the lamp and not the other side of the wall that restricted my view.  When I got closer to the end of the wall, I saw pink slippers.  Her satin pink night gown barely touched the seat that she was sitting in.  Tina sat under the lamp in the living room waiting for me to get in all night.  It gave me a relaxing feeling to know that she fell asleep before I came home.

I would have been up all night arguing after the ordeal before hand.  I decided to stretch my luck by passing the living room and entering the kitchen to see what she had cooked tonight.  I placed my briefcase and my suit jacket in the closet in the hallway.  I walked solemnly to the kitchen, turned on the light, and carefully opened the lid of the pots.  The pots were metal making a slight cling when I took the lids off.  Hearing this, I quickly turned to see if the pink slippers were going to move but they didn't.  There was baked chicken, peas, and mashed potatoes with a lonely pot of gravy sitting on the back burner.  I didn't want the trouble of opening and closing the microwave because of the sound that it made.  I put a small amount of food on a paper plate and began to eat as I put on my slippers for bed.

            I sat at the polished, wooden kitchen table and made every bite count as the paranoid thought of my wife waking up crept in to my head.  I finished what was left of the small meal I gathered and put the pots away.  The least I could do for my wife is put the pots in the refrigerator.  Even when I put the pots away, Tina was still sleep.  I began to become more relaxed with my movements now that I was in the house for sometime.  I put on the shower to get the gravel off of my skin.  Right before I could get into the shower, Tina calls out my name.  "Mike is that you", she asks coming closer to the bathroom.  "Yes, I'm right here", I say as my stomach turns in disgust.  "There you are.  So where were you all night and don't tell me you were at the bar all night", she says putting her hands on her hips. 

            "Yes, I was at the bar but it was only to get rid of the stress at work", knowing it was because of her attitude that I went in the first place.  "How come you didn't pick up your phone again?  What were you doing that distracted you from calling your wife?  Whoa, Whoa, Whoa!  What is that on your cheek", she asked.  "My cheek", I said and just then I remembered that Alice thanked me for stepping in between her and her boyfriend.  "Here we go again", I thought looking at Tina's face while she stared at my cheek.  From there, the night lasted as long as she questioned everything about my bar visit and that went on all night long.  "Another woman?  Another woman!  You stayed out late tonight to see another woman", she stated.  I figured it would be best to tell what really happened so I did.

            The whole time I was telling her the truth, her face began to turn from angry to confused.  I told her about the fight between me and Alice's boyfriend and what I seen happening between the two at Ups and Downs.  I told her about the ass kicking I took and the cops who hesitantly road past me on my way home.  I even told her about the cigarettes I smoked in the car and the drinks I had while sitting at the bar.  I wanted to see what she would say when I told her the truth instead of trying to make up something to match how she would feel.  "Are you serious?  And all of this happened tonight", she asked still looking confused.  I nodded my head in agreement and I looked at her eyes to see if it would land me on the couch with another headache and back pains.

              "Tonight must have been a hell of a night for you", she said rubbing my shoulders.  I agreed with a head nod and began to relax with the shoulder rub she was giving me.  "Would you like me to help you with your shower", she asked kissing my neck lightly.  I put on my puppy dog face that she feels pity for and I nodded my head yes again.  "Yeah, well I don't believe that just like I don't believe that story that you gave me", she said storming out of the bathroom.  I put my head down because I knew where I had to sleep tonight and it wasn't going to be fun.  At least I could think on the kiss Alice gave me earlier.  I got in the shower and cleaned the gravel off the back of my head wondering how the hell this could happen to me tonight of all nights.

            I put on my sleeping clothes and not to my surprise, my pillow and cover was waiting for me on the hardest couch in the century.  The clock read 11:10 pm and it was only a Monday.

 

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Matt Faircloth-

I'm tired of being used
I wear my heart on my sleeve
I do what I mean and I mean what I say
They take the life right out of me
I'm tired of being fucked with
Get the hell out of my face
Why do you hurt me?
Was it all a fuckin' waste?
Don't step on me
You enjoy it, don't you?
You like seeing me down and out
Well I know what I can do

It's best that you leave me out
Just leave me alone
I hate playing games like this
I'm more than you'll ever know
They told me how you were
And I didn't listen to them
Well fuck, I can see it now
They said I would get hurt
You ruined me
You ruined me
You ruined me
You ruined me

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Annie Holland Life

Don't you understand!? I cant be with you. Im fighting it now. The tears are coming down... Im torn between things. Have i been waiting all this

 

time but you have been there right in front of me my whole life? Tonight you told me you had a question to ask me but that you would not ask me

 

for a couple of weeks or so. This alarms me. Please dont scare me off which is starting to happen. I don't know anymore. Where am i supposed

 

to be in life? I am always saying how much i want a guy and here you come showing up back into my life. You were a real Jack ass to me. You

 

cut me off in your life we never talked at all. I would see you and try to talk to you.... You never talked back but i guess i learned to accept the act

 

the fact that you hated me so i said to hell with it. Its been 3 yrs now and the car wreck changed everything. Were back talking again. You said

 

you were sorry but im still getting alarm bells ringing in my head. Im so confused now and i really am afraid of coming to see you tommorow.

 

Please tell me that i can trust you!  Can I?   *sigh*

"A Cure" - Michael Buskill

A Cure

 

            Tired. I can't tell you the last time I got a good night's sleep. I just don't sleep well anymore. My ever restless mind won't let me rest. There's too much running through it; too much for me to think about at one time. Now my head hurts.

            With so much running through my mind, I lost track of the days. In fact, all yesterday I thought it was the 22^nd. Damn. I need a break. Good thing the semester is coming to a close. But, that won't really put an end to my problems. Most of the things on my mind are completely unrelated to school.

            I have too much inner conflict. I'm beginning to hate myself little by little. There's so many things that I just can make up my mind on. My thoughts feel dense. Tangible. They cause me pain. Physical pain. Mental anguish. It's actually made me sick. I want to stop this pain, but I can't seem to find a cure.

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"An Unexpected Guest" - Michael Buskill

An Unexpected Guest

 

            BANG! Not the best way to wake up. "What the hell was that", I asked no one in particular. Leaping from the couch I had fallen asleep on, I look out the window. It's still dark. I check my watch. 3:43 a.m. BANG! I jumped slightly. It's coming from the back door.

            I slowly creep towards the kitchen as I draw my pocket knife. Questions are flying through my mind. What's that noise? Is it a burglar? What should I do? Am I going to stab him? What if he has a gun? What if it's nothing at all? I quickly glance around the corner and look out the small window of the back door. There's someone there.

            The back door to my brother's house is held shut by a bungee cord because the doorknob broke…two years ago. The man was pulling on the door, trying to open it enough to unhook the cord, but he can't keep it open long enough, resulting in the door slamming shut. Now I'm laughing slightly. I sit and watch him at his task for another fifteen minutes before he finally manages to unhook it.

            I stood as he opened the door and he hesitated he saw me. That's just what I needed him to do. I rushed the door and gave it a forceful kick, knocking the man of the six foot tall steps and onto the gravel below. I pulled the door shut and latched it with the bungee cord before I heard a much more distinct bang and the shatter of glass. He shot through the window of the door, hurling small pieces of glass at my face.

            Bleeding from a large cut under my eye, I reach for my phone, but it's not on my belt. I stagger to my brother's room and find it sitting on his dresser. I look over and see that he is still asleep. "Ronnie", I shout, trying to wake him, but he doesn't budge. "Ronnie", I shout again, but still no answer. I walk to the bed and roll him over onto his back. His throat has been slit.

            BANG! I sneak into the living room and find the front door already open. The deadbolt had been shot out of it. I can hear someone in the next room. I rush to the doorway and duck down next to it. As a figure moves through the doorway I turn and slash, feeling the wet warmth of blood spill onto my hand. The man drops to the floor, thrashing. One look was enough to make me realize that it's not the same guy from before.

            I take the gun from the now dead man's hand and creep into the yard. I have to find the other man. I circle the house a few times, but find no trace of him. And then I hear it. Crunching grass. Footsteps. I turn, gun in hand, to find …me. The other man…is me. "Impossible", I whispered.

            The imposter raises his gun and smiles. "You never stood a chance", he said just before he pulled the trigger. I feel the bullet tear through my chest. I hit the ground. I can't move. The imposter stands over me, laughing as he points the gun to my face. He says nothing. He only laughs. BANG!

            I shoot up from my bed. It's still dark outside. I check my watch. 3:43 a.m. I walk to the closet and pull out my box of pocket knives, select the largest one and put the box back. I place the knife on my dresser and lay back down. Just in case.

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